Three weeks in row.

(Weekend sarging report 27-28.01.2012)

It’s been three weeks in row that my sarging resulted in some solid # close or possible meet, I definitely hope that it is due my improvements and all the work I put into getting better and not just luck.

I spent entire last week catching up on theory, not so much on how to approach, but more on a part of verbal game, given that I dislike routines or anything scripted (unless it taken from my own life) I spent most of my learning on improvisation and even touched some SS (speed seduction) learning and practicing exercises. I am not finished yet, but the results were positive so far.

Planning on continuing sticking and improving with SS and improvisation, because they will increase my communication abilities and skills, which is very important for the cold day game approach.

As per usual I went out to sarge on Friday and Saturday and made total of 12 approaches.

Friday

Went out and did 6 approaches, the mall was empty, so I went on doing approaches for the sake of approaches just to not feel that I came there and just wasted my Friday evening. So I just approached those few chicks that I was able to find without much consideration for the target selection.  To make matter worse I was really tired and just wanted to put some approaches and get out of there as fast as I can.

As predicted the thing went so so, and nothing stack out beside one of the approaches when chick gave me a face like I came to ask her for the money. I just smiled and ejected and continued to going on with my day when two minutes later I turn around and realize she is following me, pretty creepy lol

Saturday

Completely different story than Friday, I got a good sleep and rested well and came to mall full of energy. While walking there met my wing and we walked a bit together.

The first approach of the day was some blonde chick that looked very good from far, but as I approached her actually much older and not attractive at all, so I switch to indirect.

Two next one I get polite thank you and one of them told she doesn’t want a compliment, I reframed and joked with both of them and they both laughed, but I ended up ejecting, if chick is not interested than I don’t feel like staying there and convincing her otherwise, considering that the next good set might be a minute of time away from this one.

Another one is blow out, I failed to close the distance gap while approaching and as per usual it simply did not go nowhere.

HB8

This is young chick (around 18 years old) from Bangladesh, very good looking and studying accounting. Had a very good conversation with her, joked a lot around and I even mini isolated her. My whole weeks of practicing improvisation kicked in, and I felt like I could talk for hours and never run out of things to say and be able to keep it light and flirty. Had a really good time talking to her for like 10-15 minutes, she seemed very into it.

I was so sure that the number close will be easy with her, that I was surprised when she said she comes from very strict family and is not allowed to give her numbers away or meet with guys. I just told her it is ok and would not want her number unless she comfortably with it, and that she has nothing to worry. She said no it is not this, and went to whole explaining herself why she cannot, but basically point was that she could get into serious trouble if she would give me her number.

I parted on a good terms with her, and think it was a successful sarge.

HB8.5

She is last set of the day, she is really good looking and seemed to be a highly educated and intelligent chick, I usually always run into problems sarging those one. She is what somebody refers as VIP (very intelligent pussy lol). She walks with the traveling briefcase, I approach her, she stops and turns fully to me, she is also confidently shakes my hand, I make a note that she is possibly confident and are high self-esteem chick, joked about brief case and how small it is and she cannot possibly go far with such a small language. She was on her way to Montreal for couple days.

It appears she is from Brazil, and in Toronto visiting some of her family. I had a really good interaction with it, there were moments where we laughed without stopping, I even managed to try some NLP stuff on her by anchoring those good and fun moments to myself and anchoring how it is good and positive thing to meet people (me). I was quite surprising how she reacted, her behavior that was very good to me turned to be even better.

Unfortunately I missed on building comfort and qualifying her, I did those things a bit, but i know it was not enough. At one point she started touching me and asking all those questions and revealing information about herself, she seemed to be making genuine effort to get to know me, but I did not recognize it at the moment. Definitely something I am going to give attention from now on and adjust strategy accordingly.

At the end of 20 minutes interaction told her that we have to at least meet before she goes back to Brazil, she told me she will be coming back to Toronto after a while and it is not going to be our only one meet.

Took her number, and texted her 10 minutes after, got a good response. The plan is to hit her back on Friday when she comes back and take it from there.

All in all almost got two numbers out of 6 approaches, which reminds me it doesn’t matter how current set going, because the next one, good one is just around corner.

PS: The update on HBFeminist comming soon.

Flake and future plans

This is report from last Saturday and some of my wants for future.

Update on HB7.5 :

I never heard from her or saw her again, she flaked. Evening prior to this I was thinking about the situation and came to conclusion that there only so much you can do to make close decent, but from the moment you let her go to the moment you going to see her again (possibly) this time is out of my control whatsoever. I decided that while I would like to meet her, I am ok if she flakes, I am happy with my interaction with her and if she flakes it simply means that I will have success with a next girl or girl after next.

I arrived at the mall 10 minutes before meeting her, and 20 minutes past scheduled time when she did not call and did not come, I just moved on and went to sarge. Unfortunately I straggled with finding targets and found only 2 girls to approach, and left after an hour because the mall simply was not so great.

So there is not much to say about this day.

Where I want to go and just thoughts

The more time I go out, the more I start to realize what I want out of it and what needs to be done to improve.

One of the things I want is to transition from picking up girl during the sarge only to picking up girls anywhere I notice a good looking girl. I still plan to and have sarging sessions as it is great time to experiment and test, but lately I been feeling growing urge to sarge just everywhere.

I just feel that I want to start meeting girls anywhere the opportunity presents rather than only during sarge. I like Vince Kelvin style and how social he is; also his style seems to very close to what actually works for me, add to it that he is short (probably shorter than me, and is in his middle 50’s and bangs young chicks) so I want to go more with this direction.

I also need to learn to be flirty more, I am currently happy with my approaches and body language, but I do often slip into boring conversations and lose sets for it, I need to stop do it.

I need to concentrate more on insta dates, with my latest flake I realized it is probably easier to sleep with girl same day (if she into you) than take her number and try to get her out to meet. I think insta-dates are a good middle ground for this.

If I needed to give short version of my wants: I want to become more social and flirty with girls and meet them anywhere as I go with my life.

Day 1 tomorrow? Let’s see

It is Friday and I just got from the sarging few hours ago, did a 9 sets in 1 hour and 15 minutes and very happy with how I manage on field. Also, possibly have a scheduled day1 for tomorrow with a girl I approached today.

I arrive to the mall go through my usual routine of having coffee and start approaching. I feel slight tingle of AA, but luckily I know a best cure for it. Within next 35 minutes I approach 5 girls, all 5 unfortunately lead nowhere, some girls are in real rush and some were on their way to meet a bf.

Beside one out of those 5 that blew me out, I got good reactions from the rest, but something still felt not right, so I go out and have a cigarette and analyze what I am doing wrong. I come to conclusion it is a body language and vocal projection. Back to mall, make corrections and approaching again.

My next sets go much better.

HB8.5: this is very tall (remember I am fairly short myself) Russian blonde, I stop her as she is about to go to store, deliver my opener and get a bit weird reaction. I ignore it and transition to the topic, we talk for a 30 seconds when she says “I am sorry but I don’t think that this conversation will go where you want it to go”. I start laughing, wish her a good day and eject.

HB8.2: I and she briefly exchange eye contact, and I go to approach her. She is mesmerized by my eye contact, I deliver opener and go into transition when she says to me

Her: I am so sorryyyy, but I have a bf.

Me: I still think the compliment is well deserved

Her: I cannot believe how confident and brave you are, it is just amazing. I just cannot believe it. Please keep doing it.

Me: (laughing as I wish her a good day and eject).

I have no doubt the bf line was honest.

HB7.5:

She is the last and 9^th approach for a day, the mall was getting empty by this time and I was about to leave, when I see her walking very fast, she is artsy type of chick and is about 18-19 years old, the ones I generally don’t approach.

We exchange brief eye contact; I stop and start thinking if I should approach her. The answer is yes and I go after her to catch her up.

Me: Hi… can I give you a compliment?

She get scared but I easily calm her down, for some reason I am very good at calming them down if they got scared during initial approach.

Her: (gives me a big smile) you came to tell me about my winter coat? Few people today already commented on it

Me: no, but I think you cute and I wanted to come over and say hi to you

It is not what she expected, she starts blushing and is completely blown away lol.

I ask what she is doing here and she says she is actually on her way to meet friends, I am about to eject, when she turns to me, takes step closer and says let’s keep talking and asks me what I am doing there.

I transition and we exchange names, apparently she has many Russian friends and she knows how to spell my short version of name in Russian, she asks for permission to use it and call me by it. She also noticed that my accent is not fully Slavic but has some middle eastern in it. Now my turn to be blown away, not one ever noticed it.

We keep talking and I go into what she is doing in her life, she says she is an event organizer and in fact has an event tomorrow; we both have big smiles and vibe is just electric. She eagerly invites me to the event and seems like really wants to see me.

It appears she is out of Toronto and don’t have a Toronto phone number yet, but she is moving to the city very soon and for now she is staying at her bff house. I tell her since it is so hard to get a hold of her and this city is so huge that people never will meet each other again unless they have communication line, I tell her let’s make a deal and meet right here tomorrow for 1 O’clock. She grabs the opportunity with two hands and agrees right away, asks me what we going to do. I tell I am going to take you for an Indian food and go all the way with over selling the place, I bet the owner doesn’t advertise his place as I did it for her lol

We continue talking and I apply fair amount of kino, touching her winter coat and commenting on it. We go back to why I approached, and I just tell her that I noticed her, wanted to approach but it took some will to actually go and do it. At this point she is blushing, and standing very close to me and I suddenly realize she wants a kiss. Obviously it is a bad idea and if I go for it there is high probability I am not going to see her ever again, but on other hand the window of opportunity to escalate is opened and I need to do something about it because if I don’t, the attraction most likely will go downhill.

So I go for a hug, grab her with my two hands and give her somewhat strong hug, she sneaks herself into me, wraps her hands around me squeezes me strongly with her hands and pulls me toward herself. It is clear she likes me a lot.

We continued to talk, and she almost begged me few times to come to her event, she also said she will call tomorrow (in case she late or something changes) from her friend phone and asked me to pick up the phone. I told her to not call but just come, bring her cute smile and just enjoy the time together. She also commented few times how confident and nice I am (not sure what the hell this ‘nice’ thing is about).

I scheduled date to 1PM at exactly same location where I approached her, it is convenient time, as I am going to sarge tomorrow and will be there anyways, so her showing up or not will not change nothing in the way my day would go.

I give it very high probability that she will show up tomorrow, but on other side given how young she is, her friends probably have a big influence on her and they might convince her otherwise.

I guess we will see.

Long overdue

This is basically report of my last Friday and Saturday; I planned to write it earlier but did not manage to find a time.

I noticed something interesting, if my approaches go wrong, I usually within 2-3 approaches can point out what I am doing wrong and adjust accordingly. I just realized it this weekend.

Friday

My head was so messed up that nothing I did went right. I came to the mall but my head was elsewhere. While walking in mall saw my wing sarging there as well and joined him for a bit, it is nice to see him going out and putting work to get better.

Made a total of 6 approaches and at least 3 of them were older woman whom looked young from the far. First 3 approaches were harsh blow out; I decide to stop for a second and analyze it and realize what I did wrong, it helps and 3 other ones go much better.

Two funny ones:

HB8: Middle Eastern chick, she was standing by herself close to the store entrance, I was not sure if she waits for somebody or just standing and texting. 10 seconds later I see her walking away but then come back, I decide she is by herself and go and open her. She is very responsive and we have very strong eye contact. But, as soon as I finish my opener and transition, somebody comes from a side, I turn my head and it is her friends who stands there and laugh. I start laughing myself and wish her a good day.

As they walk away I hear the HB8 excitedly telling her friend about my approach. I clearly made her day if not a month lol

HB6.5: she is the last approach of the day. I am on my way out of the mall and to go home when I spot her, she looks hot from behind; I approach and realize her much older. I open her with my usual opener, she is about to reject me and actually started to say it, but stops after two words and cannot force herself and starts laughing. I wish her good day, give a light touch on her hands and walk away.

Saturday

Came to mall and saw my wing again, joined him for a bit but since I am there to do my own thing I joined them and drifted away few times during the day.

God about 5 approaches and few decent conversations, but really nothing stands out. So I will leave it at this.

Update on HBFeminist (the HB8.5 from previous report I #):

She was the reason why my head was so screwed up on Friday. I kept chatting with her throughout week and by Friday realized that all I did with her I did wrong. Being very self-critical, it messed up with my badly. Despite this I still attempted to schedule day1 with her for Saturday which she as expected politely declined.

I brush it off and decide not contact her for 4-5 days and then just initiate text on Wednesday and keep it short and light, just to keep the door open if she ever decides to contact me again, and to sub communicate I am not affected by her saying no.

But initially I decided I killed the attraction and measured her level of interest very low. Basically I moved on.

What you know, on Monday she contacts me first. I exchange few light texts and leave it at this. Tuesday we text again, and again I keep it to 3 texts and light. I did not contact her yesterday. The plan is to contact her today and try to schedule day1 again, but this time  I will go with very low investment invite (low from my side) and kind of it either way ok attitude. If she declines again, will move on and re-contact her again after week with texting (to keep door for her open if she decides to change her mind) and then write her off.

Basically if she says no, than it is just easier to go and approach and find another girl, which I should do anyways. I outlined my mistakes with texting her and will learn from it.

P.S: I will post texts convo’s with inviting her out once it is all over. I have my mistakes outlined on another blog (I keep blog on wordpess) but not sure if moderators will be ok with non-commercial personal blog link.

Recap:

I realized something with holding their hand or shoulder longer than just light touch during the approach, you have to have a very strong and congruent presence otherwise the thing is just will blow in your face. I guess it is basically more risk more reward situation. I am going to experiment with this for a while.

Time to get better at texting

Figured out I will put a short update on the HBFeminist that I # closed during my last sarge. This short update is mostly a remembering point and learning analysis.

Initially I had a very high interest from her and eagerness to meet combined with few shit tests that I did not know how to handle and probably failed. My lack of texting experience shined trough roof.

As of this moment I think the lead with her pretty dead and it will go nowhere, I still have her number but I am not sure if I want to put an effort and try to pull her off as I dropped a ball and expect even if we met it is going to be an uphill battle. I think it is easier to find a new prospects than try to salvage the one that gone bad.

Things I did right:

Unfortunately I did only one thing right, and it is stayed confident and very low drama and light with my responses.

Things I did wrong:

Way too much contact, looking back I probably would be better off contacting her for total of 2-3 times during a week and just keep it humorous, light and short, and nail meet up details on second or third of them. I probably come off as needy and not congruent with a confidence and strong presence I displayed during initial approach. She actually shit tested me on this, but I failed the test.

I am still unsure how to deal with shit tests, I am very confident in person and naturally cocky and challenging, but during this texting exchanges I felt like I hit some blind spots and many times was unsure of what to do. Initially I just ignored her shit tests, and she reacted by withdrawing from texting, but always came around and initiated first and was more more warm and more engaging. Looking back I think acknowledging shit test in some funny way with joke would be probably much better option. So in conclusion, while I did not play along her shit tests, I did not deal with them a best way I could.

Few times during texting I tried to stir to some slightly sexual vibe, she had none of it, and again I did not know what to do. Maybe it was a mistake and probably just should keep texting light and funny, nails meet up as fast as I can and keep all the escalation to the meet up itself?!

Conclusion:

It is sucks to lose a chick who was sure thing for a day1, but nothing I can do except to learn from it and move on.

P.S: I might remove this post in a later date, as I was finishing writing I realized all the things I spoke of are common sense and basic in nature.